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7 Chapter Seven: Life is like a game of PIG

The card game, not the basketball game.

This is how it goes. Begin by picking out cards to make a “deck” that contains a four-of-a-kind for each player. Shuffle, and deal four cards to each player. Trying to accumulate four-of-a-kind, the dealer chooses one card from her hand and passes it to the player to her left. That player, in turn, chooses one card from his hand and passes it to the player at his left. Play continues until one player has accumulated four-of-a-kind, at which point she discretely sets her cards down and places her finger on her nose. Once one player has done this, the other players must notice and place their fingers on their noses and the last to do so gets a letter (“P” or “I” or “G”). The first player to accumulate the three letters of PIG loses the game. If you haven’t played it for a while, play it a few times before reading on—it will make a difference in your understanding of what follows.

The game (also sometimes known as “Spoons”) seems to be about getting four of a kind, but it is really about watching to see if someone else does. As each player eventually figures out, if you focus on getting four of a kind, you will lose.

Things in life are often not about what they seem to be. And figuring that out—and what they really are about—is crucial. People argue about one thing when they are really mad about another. You may go to activities that seem like they are about accomplishing one thing (like a ropes course, which might seem to be about learning to climb) which are really about something else (like building confidence or teams). Companies seem to be in one business (like professional baseball) when they are really in another business (like entertainment). You may go bowling on a date, but the goal is not to bowl your best, but to spend time together and learn about each other. This may seem obvious, but it is amazing how frequently we forget it. If you don’t figure out and focus on what things are really about, you will miss their potential for making a difference.

Nowhere is this more true than in figuring out what your life is about. At first it seems like your life is about survival and building the best life you can by accumulating friends, knowledge, things, a family, etc. But you may find it is about more than all of those—and discovering that will unleash your potential for making a difference. Some stories of people who have realized that (and what they’ve done about it) are listed in the appendix—but I’m sure you can find (and create!) one on your own.

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