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13 CHAPTER THIRTEEN: Change is Constant

I once heard a story of a physics professor demonstrating the various states of matter with a large bucket of Silly Putty and a sledge hammer. He began by striking the surface of the Silly Putty with the hammer, only to have the hammer bounce off violently. He did that a few times to show that it wasn’t a fluke. He then set the hammer down on the top of the Silly Putty and walked to the board to begin talking about what they had seen and the nature of solids. After a few minutes, he looked over to the bucket and, feigning surprise, pointed out that the head of the hammer had now sunk below the surface of the Silly Putty—given more time, the Silly Putty was acting like a liquid. Something that seemed fixed and static had changed significantly in behavior and form with time. In the natural world, we know that rock formations crack and crumble, the sun and moon and planets and stars are continually moving in the sky, and that we are all getting older.

While we are often surprised by it, we all know—and experience daily—that, as a Greek philosopher observed 2500 years ago, “the only constant in life is change.” As much as we tend to settle in to the current situation and expect it will continue, nothing in our world stays the same.

Accepting, responding to, and, where possible, managing change is a critical part of life. Sometimes that means adapting to, and making the best of change over which we have no control. There are lots of books on how to do that—a popular one is “Who Moved My Cheese?,” which explores the varying success with which four different characters adapt to the challenges of a changing world.

I once heard Lee Schulman, President of Carnegie Foundation for the Advancement of Teaching, compare people experiencing change to white-water kayakers, who have three options. They can try to paddle back upstream to the way things used to be, but will just exhaust themselves to no effect. They can get mad about it and throw up their hands, but then they will simply be moved as the current carries them. The third option is to do their best to read the currents and paddle like crazy to ensure that their knowledge, expertise, and perspective have some impact on their path through the turbulence. Fighting or ignoring such change never really works—just look at Kodak, who actually invented the first digital camera, but failed to shift from film to digital, and consequently saw its stock price fall 72% in just six years.

And while such change can create hardship, it usually also creates opportunity. You may actually end up in a better place and, in any case, the ride of change through the white-water may foster growth and offer advantages—and be thrilling! As a former currency trader, I can tell you it was very difficult to make money in static markets, but we had the potential to make a lot when markets were volatile.

But not all change comes from the outside and we all have the opportunity—and sometimes the responsibility—to foster change in our world and ourselves, and usually not in that order: Gandhi famously advised that, “You must be the change you want to see in the world” and Michael Jackson put that counsel to music in the lyrics to Man in the Mirror. In the chapter on Faith I quote Augustine, who said: “Bad times! Troublesome times! This men are saying. Let our lives be good; and the times are good. We make our times; such as we are, such are the times.”

Each of us is continually being changed by our experiences and relationships, but consciously changing to make yourself better is hard work. There are lots and lots of books on that too, but before picking one up, it’s important to have some sense of how you hope to change, which takes having a sense of what is important to you and who you want to become. You don’t need a complete and perfect understanding of how you want to change, but some sense of the direction and any specific attributes (e.g. being more patient with yourself and/or others, being more grateful and positive and hopeful, or being more disciplined in some way) is important to help ensure that change is moving you in the direction you intend. The world will suggest goals and directions for you, but you need to be thoughtful and true to yourself and not just go with the crowd.

Always remember that trying to change for the better is hard, so you should really celebrate the success of others and yourself in accomplishing change. The reason “a prophet is never acknowledged in his own town” is that people have a hard time seeing growth in others they’ve known for a long time. Take time to actually acknowledge efforts to change, and any success. Don’t for ways in which the change is not yet complete: acknowledge even degrees of change.

And remember that nobody likes to be reminded of things that they wish they had not said or done—that rarely has a positive effect. So when you’re telling stories about others, especially with other people around, try hard to avoid that. If you mean to coach someone, do it in private, and as constructively as possible.

Getting back to fostering change in the world beyond yourself, there are not only books, but courses, and entire degrees on change and change management. Being a “Change Agent” is a requirement for some jobs and is actually a job title. It’s a huge deal and well beyond this chapter or even book, but I offer the same advice I did for personal change: work hard to do the research and analysis to understand things before you make any changes—you don’t want to unplug a cord because you need the outlet, only to later discover that you unplugged the refrigerator!

It’s important to envision a process, organizational structure, or whatever that is truly better, and understanding the current situation well enough to ensure that nothing important is lost in making the change—or at least that you understand and accept the tradeoffs.

And it should be noted that sometimes people want to make changes just for the sake of change, which can be costly and a bad idea if done without good reason and careful planning. My father used to say, “Doing what has always been done is a bad substitute for thinking,” but also shared the well-known advice, “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” Both are true, and it takes research, thought, and wisdom to know when to apply each.

Altogether, while it may seem contradictory, change is, in fact, a constant in life. Try to remember that, anticipate change where you can, adapt and even embrace it when it happens, and be part of it when you think it will make things better.

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